I’ve spent a lot of time lately thinking about the way we limit ourselves. How we use words like can’t, impossible, and not for me as if they’re facts written in stone. And if I’m being honest, I’m guilty of it too. More than I want to admit.

We box ourselves in because it’s safe. Because stepping outside of what’s familiar feels terrifying. I’ve built a little world around me — one that’s predictable, one I know how to navigate, even when it hurts. And even though I dream of more, I hesitate. I tell myself, that’s not for people like me, or there’s no way I could pull that off.

But what if we flipped the script?

What if instead of saying, I can’t do that, we asked what do I need to make that happen? What if instead of I could never afford that, we asked how can I afford it? Shifting the question shifts the mindset. It turns a wall into a door. It replaces dead ends with detours, and detours with possibilities.

And let’s be honest — this isn’t the kind of thing you master overnight. I’ve spent years living with this weight on my shoulders. Years working in a world that undervalues me as a human being. People don’t understand me. They don’t see me. They see what they want to see, or worse — they look right through me. And somewhere along the way, I started seeing myself the way they did: as someone who should settle. Someone who should stay small. Someone whose happiness could wait for another time.

But I’m starting to realize something: waiting won’t save me.

If I want something different, if I want better, I have to be the one to reach for it. No one’s coming to hand it to me. No one’s going to sit me down and say, hey, you deserve more than this. That has to come from me. And if I’m being really honest, it’s scary as hell. But maybe that’s the point.

Nothing good grows in a comfort zone. Nothing incredible happens by staying small. And yet — we stay. Because it’s familiar. Because even pain can feel easier than uncertainty. Because when you’ve spent years stuck in survival mode, dreaming bigger feels like a luxury you can’t afford.

But here’s the thing:
Fear and growth can coexist.

It’s not about erasing the fear. It’s about doing it scared. It’s about taking the first step, even if your voice shakes and your hands tremble. It’s about believing — or at least being willing to try to believe — that better is possible.

I’m working on rewiring my brain. A brain that, for years, defaulted to negativity. A mind trained to expect the worst, to doubt my own worth, to stay in my lane. And I won’t lie to you: it’s hard. Really damn hard. Some days I wake up with this heavy ache in my chest, this voice in my head telling me it’s safer to stay where I am. That risking joy might only lead to disappointment.

But you know what? I don’t even let my kids use the word impossible. Not in my house. I correct them every single time. So why have I been giving myself permission to use it on me? Why have I been convincing myself that forward isn’t an option? That better isn’t for me?

Here’s the truth:
There’s better out there. For me. For you. I know it. I feel it in my bones. And no one can hand it to me but me.

It won’t be easy. It might break my heart a few times. I might fail. I might fall. But failure isn’t the end. It’s a lesson. It’s proof that I tried. And every time I get back up, I’m one step closer to building the life I actually want instead of the one I settled for.

So if you’re reading this and you feel stuck, if you’re sitting in your comfort zone, afraid to move, let this be your reminder:

Nothing worth having comes easy.
Growth isn’t comfortable.
But comfort isn’t where magic lives.

You don’t have to stay small. You don’t have to play by their rules. You don’t have to settle for a life that leaves you hollow.

And neither do I.

So here’s to doing it scared. To asking the better questions. To flipping the script.
To refusing to believe in impossible.

We’ve got this.